Dear Friends,
This week’s Torah portion includes the exotic commandment of the “Unlit Light.”
Yes, we are commanded to remove all fluorescent light bulbs and LED light bulbs from all of our fixtures, and to replace them with hand-dipped tallow candles, preferably of an ugly tan color, and to leave them “Unlit,” from evening until morning, so that we might sit meditatively in the dark, and then trip over our slippers on the way to the bathroom.
Torah calls this the “Ner Tamid,” which many mistakenly translate as “Eternal Light.” (Exodus 27:20) But, a recent study, led by Chaim Greenberg ben Solomon haOr v’haChoshechi and his partner, Batya Ora bat Batya haTipshit, chief electrical engineers for GE until they departed to develop systems of using earwax for Yankee Candles, determined that the phrase, “Ner Tamid” actually means either Ronald McDonald’s ketchup drips, or Unlit Light, depending on whether it is read right to left or left to right.
Either way, Torah charges us to replace fluorescent and LED fixtures with tallow candles. However, state law forbid lighting tallow candles in light fixtures, as they may cause lampshades to ignite. The rabbis, though, forbid removing lampshades, because we might accidentally either lift one on Shabbat, which is a terrible sin, or we might remove a shade and start dancing with our spouse and become romantic, which is allowable, but we might be perceived as dancing with our neighbor’s spouse, as there would be insufficient light for another nosy neighbor peering in the window to determine with whom one is actually dancing, and thus to offer legitimate gossip, so the rabbis categorically forbade removing lampshades, and forbade lighting candles which could catch lampshades on fire, or result in dancing and gossip.
So, we sit in the dark, which is an age-old Jewish condition. The ancient Talmud, presaging Thomas Edison’s discoveries, asked in Masechet Cheshmal v’Narishkeit (Tractate Electricity and Stupidity), “Why should a Jew not use electricity on Shabbat? And they answered, ‘Who’d want to watch TV or use a computer to talk to the kids in California – Jews would rather complain. Forbid the electricity, and my second cousin, the psychiatrist, will be busy on Monday!’”
To which Rashi, our Medieval Torah sage asked the famous question, “How many Jews does it take to change a lightbulb?” To which Maimonides, our other Medieval sage responded, “What’s a lightbulb? Feh, where’s the unlit candle, I’ll sit in the dark.”
And, thus, the “Eternal Light” became the “Unlit Light,” and tripping over our slippers has been Jewish practice ever since! And, so has Jews dancing with lampshades on their heads, but never on Shabbat!
Shabbat Shalom, and Happy Purim,
Rabbi Douglas Kohn
This week’s Torah portion includes the exotic commandment of the “Unlit Light.”
Yes, we are commanded to remove all fluorescent light bulbs and LED light bulbs from all of our fixtures, and to replace them with hand-dipped tallow candles, preferably of an ugly tan color, and to leave them “Unlit,” from evening until morning, so that we might sit meditatively in the dark, and then trip over our slippers on the way to the bathroom.
Torah calls this the “Ner Tamid,” which many mistakenly translate as “Eternal Light.” (Exodus 27:20) But, a recent study, led by Chaim Greenberg ben Solomon haOr v’haChoshechi and his partner, Batya Ora bat Batya haTipshit, chief electrical engineers for GE until they departed to develop systems of using earwax for Yankee Candles, determined that the phrase, “Ner Tamid” actually means either Ronald McDonald’s ketchup drips, or Unlit Light, depending on whether it is read right to left or left to right.
Either way, Torah charges us to replace fluorescent and LED fixtures with tallow candles. However, state law forbid lighting tallow candles in light fixtures, as they may cause lampshades to ignite. The rabbis, though, forbid removing lampshades, because we might accidentally either lift one on Shabbat, which is a terrible sin, or we might remove a shade and start dancing with our spouse and become romantic, which is allowable, but we might be perceived as dancing with our neighbor’s spouse, as there would be insufficient light for another nosy neighbor peering in the window to determine with whom one is actually dancing, and thus to offer legitimate gossip, so the rabbis categorically forbade removing lampshades, and forbade lighting candles which could catch lampshades on fire, or result in dancing and gossip.
So, we sit in the dark, which is an age-old Jewish condition. The ancient Talmud, presaging Thomas Edison’s discoveries, asked in Masechet Cheshmal v’Narishkeit (Tractate Electricity and Stupidity), “Why should a Jew not use electricity on Shabbat? And they answered, ‘Who’d want to watch TV or use a computer to talk to the kids in California – Jews would rather complain. Forbid the electricity, and my second cousin, the psychiatrist, will be busy on Monday!’”
To which Rashi, our Medieval Torah sage asked the famous question, “How many Jews does it take to change a lightbulb?” To which Maimonides, our other Medieval sage responded, “What’s a lightbulb? Feh, where’s the unlit candle, I’ll sit in the dark.”
And, thus, the “Eternal Light” became the “Unlit Light,” and tripping over our slippers has been Jewish practice ever since! And, so has Jews dancing with lampshades on their heads, but never on Shabbat!
Shabbat Shalom, and Happy Purim,
Rabbi Douglas Kohn